Monday, January 31, 2011

5 Ways Superman is Nothing like Jesus

If there is any super hero made by Jewish hands that represents the Messianic hero of Christianity it is...The Ultra Yamaca.  But if there is a second hero it is Superman.  The Man of Steel has gotten so many references to Jesus Christ that you half expect Superman to wear manger nativity pajamas.  But the almighty son of the universe has some key differences over the alien who is allergic to a special rock.

5.  Superman Worry Warrior

Superman must drink 12 bottles of liquid Tums a day to deal with all the worry he gets.  The world relies on his bullet proof skin and flying powers to save them from humanity going straight to Hell.  He's spent countless hours listening to the millions of helpless citizens as they cry out to him, keeping him awake and dependent on strong coffee.  Superman spends most of his tour of America wringing his hands over missing the 1 out of a billion people in this planet who needs to be saved.  Even when Superman started aging radically because of Magog, he freaked out for most of the issue.  And don't forget, every time Darkseid tries to hurt Lois Lane?  Superman has to drop everything to save her, leaving that African child to get eaten by a lion.

Every second I sit here the world dies a little more

But Jesus was smart in his earthly ministry.  He knew his father, God, would be giving him his daily agenda to help people.  He didn't worry about the people he couldn't save because his dad would take care of them.  With his priorities fully invested in God, the master of all matter, it was okay to spend a few hours in rest and meditation.  Jesus didn't go crazy when some town person had advanced leprosy.  It was all about trust and faith in his ministry.  Of course, he was stressed by the long haul to work and the cross wasn't something to look forward to, but unlike Superman, Jesus could get free counseling from God.  And Jesus didn't stay in his earthly presence for long.  After the Ressurection, Jesus became glorified and upgraded to supervisor of Heaven, being able to take care of every aspect of humanity without getting tired at all.  No hand wringing for Jesus.

4.  Superman Uses Force

Brutal beatdowns are today's language of resolution. If comics have taught me anything its that if something has a face, it can be punched. Superman is a large Swiss Army Knife for killing. His fists are made for punching holes in the moon, his eyes shoot out cutting lasers and his breath can freeze the heart of an elephant. He basically has two career options, working in a steel mill or punching the junk out of everything that looks at him funny. His career has shown that battles have been generally won through bashing something's head in until it can no longer make cognitive decisions. It seems to be a formidable way of getting things done. But...

Jesus does not need to use his fists. In his career, the demonic threats, endless diseases and snarky religious remarks have been silenced with mere words. In some cases, just looking at Jesus makes the demons crap themselves. Not to mention that Jesus could tell your cancer to go to Hell and it would do it. If Darkseid tried to mess with Jesus' turf, he would not even need to leave his house to confront him. A simple cell phone call would send Darkseid packing. It's no wonder that Jesus tags himself on Satan's photos in Facebook to scare the bejeezus out of him.

3. Superman Doesn't Build Up People*

When you are the full package hero of Metropolis, you really can't teach anyone about having your powers. Pretty much, after you save the world, you land in front of the news cameras and say, "everything is going to be fine." Those words of false security last about an hour before Lex Luthor creates an electron cannon that uses the blood of orphans to destroy buildings. Superman does not have the ability to build up citizens and teach them to be self reliant. He is a metahuman, which puts him in a lonely category. If ever he did die the world would go belly up the next time a volcano decides to give birth to a Hell demon. His job security is through the roof.
They never got along

But, Jesus had a ministry that was about empowering people. Even though he was all about healing impossible sicknesses, he also brought along a powerful message on faith that could have ended in "And now you know and knowing is half the battle." He taught his disciples to multiply bread and fish or try to remove demons from celebrities as part of his ministry. His second plan was building up a church that could act as the hands and powers of Christs' ministry. By the time Jesus had ascended into Heaven, his disciples were doing twice as many miracles as he was. Jesus wanted a legacy of his people worshiping the one God and living out the one mission, so he could see his influence spread. When was the last time you saw an army of little Supermans following in his footsteps?

2.   Superman Can Die
I will probably get more fanboy hate mail on this, but Superman has the ability to die.  It goes without saying that he is extremely allergic to a rock, making an evil mineralogist his worst enemy.  In his battle with Doomsday, Superman takes an uppercut so hard to the face that he dies from the impact.  He is later brought back from the dead (because DC won't kill this Golden Goose ) but it will always be a sober reminder that a few punches to the face by a mega beast could take him out.  If the fans can't stand him and Superman dies, the world goes kaputz.  His life depends on marketing.

"Fine, no more Olive Garden!"

...But Jesus welcomes death like a red piece of meat in a tiger's cage.  When death came knocking on his door, Jesus was all like, "Go ahead, take me.  The man can't hold me down."  He turned out to be right because his body rose from the grave and he supersized into Jesus of the heavenly realms.  Similar to Gandolf evolving into Gandalf the White, Jesus totally became indestructible.  His new slogan became, "Nail me to a cross once, shame on you.  Nail me to a cross again...I don't think so, jabronies!"

1.   Superman's Alter Ego is a Lie

Clark Kent is the alter ego of the man in red tights. He's a bumbling, ill confident and mostly soft spoken Nerf ball.  You would not trust this guy to even water your plants.  Only when he turns to Superman does he get to act like the man he was truly raised to be.  But mostly Superman is living a lie as Clark Kent, leading people off the trail that he is a super hero.  I wonder if Superman feels like an empty shell of a man when he pretends to be an underpaid reporter.  But the moment he reveals his identity to the world his loved ones would be shanked to death by the homicidal maniacs.  Thus, he is forced to lead people astray and wear glasses.

Fashion sense is also held back

But, Jesus is a "what you see is what you get" model of humanity.  He was humble in spirit, confident in his teachings and he was not afraid to tell priests where to shove their religion.  It was only when he rose from the grave did we see the Jesus that was outside of the human shell.  In sci-fi geek terms he gained 8000 + power, strength and royalty points.  You could argue that Jesus had to hold back his powers while on Earth, but it was never to trick his enemies and keep his family safe.  He was basically giving us the privilege of seeing his softer, caring and gentle side.  If he had gone all gung-ho on the people they probably would have had their heads explode from the intense glory.

Sorta like this.

* I know that some myth stories have superman with a fan club of heroes from the year 3000.  I am talking about the classic Superman where he is the most powerful being on Earth.

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Singularity (PS3)


Company: Raven/Activision

"Great Scott, Marty, we've made a time machine."
"You mean to tell me Doc that we made a time machine out of Russia, that's heavy."
"Not as heavy as the convoluted plot of this game."
"Look on the bright side Doc, at least its not another lame zombie game."

Time travel, one of the most unused plot devices in the video game world. There is so much you can do with it. But ever since Max Payne, we've been content with just slowing down time. Singularity aims to stop all that with their new survival horror FPS.

You play as Renko, the strong, silent "Gordon Freeman" type soldier for the US. You hear news that Russia (one of the most used enemy governments in video game history) built an island, Kotorga-12, in the 1950's to do experiments on an element called E99. An explosion on the island caused all experiments to cease and the plans to go under. But in 2010, strange radioactive lights are found over the island and America sends in Renko.

Shooter games that involved Russia in 2009-2010

4. Call of Duty: Black Ops
3. Singularity
2. Goldeneye
1. Modern Warfare 2

The game is a blend of different techniques from popular games. If you took the gadgetry of Half Life 2, the smooth shooting mechanics of the Call of Duty franchise, the puzzle solving skills of Portal, and the bullet impact of Unreal, then there's a good chance that none of this game will throw you for a loop. The real treat is that the enemies are not zombies or hell demons. You fight mutant creatures that have time-infused powers. This requires you to use your time freezing powers in order to stop them. Some enemies need to be forced through a time push to prevent them from disappearing, while some enemies need to be put in a time stop bubble that gives you free reign to hammer on them. All this is done through your limited TMD which gives you these powers. One of my favorite powers is turning a baddie into a mutant and having it attack its own people.

The game is split into 2 types of combat: mutant fighting, which is more like Resistance and soldier fighting, which is more like Call of Duty. For guns you have your standard rifle, pistol, shotgun, chaingun and grenade launcher varieties, which can all be upgraded. You can also upgrade perks for healing, defense and your TMD powers. All these things revolve around and blend into a story that is more bells and whistles than actual substance--but you will have fun playing it nonetheless.

But the game is not without faults. Singularity is a survival horror game, but I was only truly scared three times during the single-player campaign. The game starts off wonderfully with a great background story, atmospheric elements and an eerie undertone that would make Silent Hill fans proud. The middle of the game loses that and replaces it with puzzles and shooting mechanics. The story only has about four places where actual plot is laid down and explained. Like most shooters, the only way to end a threat is to drop a huge bomb to fix the problem. Character development and atmosphere seem to die down immediately after they're established.

Games where setting off a bomb fixes the threat:
1. Resistance 2
2. GRAW 2
3. Halo
4. Singularity
5. Medal of Honor

The graphics are a lower quality than Medal of Honor or Call of Duty: Black Ops. Some of the facial and clothing textures are bland. The environment is clean looking and well fleshed out. One odd thing you will notice is that the Russian soldiers sound like angry French Homer Simpsons on crack.

Ultimately, Singularity is a smooth and enjoyable ride, from start to finish. It really shines in some gameplay elements, but those are few in the game. Other than that, I would not mind saying that this IP would make for a great sequel.


Time travel has always been of great fascination to me and I am glad Singularity decided to explore it. According to Einstein, it is scientifically impossible to manipulate time. God on the other hand has traversed that realm. He has seen both the beginning and the end. He knows all the paths we can take and how our decisions alter reality. He is always present with every human, and yet His presence is very personal. God always uses his omnipresent ways to show his care for creation. He watches over time, interferes with it to present Jesus to the world and even guides it to show He is in control. What effect does God's power have on you?

Content: M rated, for massive gore, profanity and violence


+ Good blend of shooting and TMD mechanics
+ Sequel potential
+ A smooth thrill ride overall

- Not the prettiest game
- Intense moments are at the beginning of the game


Sunday, January 23, 2011

Star Wars: The Force Unleashed II

Star Wars: The Force Unleashed II
Company: Lucas Arts
Systems: Xbox 360

I have always been a huge fan of Star Wars games, due mainly to the massive bosses and the depth of the story-telling. I never finished playing the original Force Unleashed, but I played enough to understand the experience and I learned the ending from friends. When I got my hands on Force Unleashed II I was stoked! New challenges! New bosses!

The game starts out with Darth Vader telling you that you are a clone and that the flashbacks you keep having aren't reality, they are a side effect of the cloning process. Your character doesn't believe Vader and escapes. He has one goal in mind: find his love (returning character, Juno from Force Unleashed) and she will give him the answers he seeks. It sounded exciting enough.

During my trip to find her, I also picked up the general of the Rebel Alliance, who helps me out (except not when it comes to fighting...). After a handful of fairly short levels, I meet Vader. He has captured my precious Juno, so I'm forced to have an epically long battle with him. This single battle takes about as long as half of the entire game, and at the end I was given my FIRST choice between the light and dark side. I chose the light side (and looked up the cutscene for the dark side on youtube). At this point there's an amazing cutscene, which put me on the edge of my seat, anticipating what would come next, and cue... credits?

The end of this game comes far too early and abruptly. If you choose the dark side ending, the cutscene makes for a much clearer ending, but still leaves you feeling like you wanted to accomplish more than finding a girl. The short length of Force Unleashed II really dissapointed me, not just because the story felt imcomplete, but also because I only had ONE epic lightsaber duel, ONE epicly large monster battle, and ONE intricate jumping/force maze.

The gameplay in Force Unleashed II has a very low learning-curve, but there's no way to personalize it. I'm a big fan of personalizing fighting styles, but this game leaves very little room for this. There's also no real push to develop your character. You start out with almost all of the available force abilities, and until you get them to their highest level, it's hard to tell them apart.

One place where I can give this game high marks is the graphics. The fighting was smooth, the cutscenes were crisp, the opening cutscene was almost believable! There was nothing wrong with the art-style or presentation in this game. Hats off to Lucas Arts for the cinematic and graphic work put into this game!

Star Wars: The Force Unleashed II was TONS of fun, the fun was just too bland, and cut way too short.

Spiritual Point:

Star Wars is known for its good vs. evil approach to everything. This game has very little of that until the end. For the most part, your character is shown as a man stuck right in the middle, trying to figure out himself first, then decide which side he wants to be on. He is very selfish and strong willed, but also seems to have a good heart.

+ Exciting
+ Fast-Paced
+ Great Graphics

- Lame Story
- Really Short
- No Personalization


Verses That Everyone Thinks are in the Bible- Part II

"God Helps Those Who Help Themselves"
This is a favorite verse of the American people and one quoted by many misdirected Bible readers.
What Does it Mean?
Basically, this is saying that sometimes the best way to get divine help with your problem is to take the initiative and do it yourself. Mostly, this verse is quoted by people who are not seeing results in prayer and want to speed up the process (eg. Eharmony users).
Why it's Not in the Bible
Wouldn't God want me to be a man of action? Wouldn't the creator of free will desire me to take the initiative and get things done in my life? Yes and no (but mostly no).

The flow of the Bible has suggested that God has given us two tools: 1) Free will to choose what is best for us (or worst) and 2) The ability to see God as a cosmic dad.

Those who have seen God as a cosmic dad are more likely to take wisdom, intelligence, resources, insight, self-worth and purpose in their life. Abraham was asked to ditch his pagan gods in exchange for being the father of all Israel's children. He also relied on God so he could have a baby, while he and his wife were older than Mick Jagger. Moses relied on God to turn him from a stuttering speaker with no backbone, to the leader with a law. With God in his corner he freed the Hebrew slaves, led Israel through a giant sea and incidentally invented the first Jet Ski system for travel. King David was just a shepherd boy, barely stronger than the sheep he took care of, but he was used to convince Goliath that his head was made for rocks. His trust in God led him to be Israel's favorite king and an ancestor of Jesus.
Conversely, those who did not wait for God's help and tried to help themselves had some tragic (and gross) outcomes. Lot's daughters were so worried about having sons that they got their father drunk and...I can't finish this... The one time Moses tried to help himself he killed an Egyptian slave master and was forced into hiding from Pharaoh. King David let his libido try to help him and he became the adulterous king, which invoked God's wrath. When rain didn't come to Israel, the Israelites went to and tried their luck with a rain god. This resulted in a nationwide plague of idol worship. There are tons of biblical examples of people helping themselves instead of waiting for God, but it usually ends tragically.
Why We Think it's in the Bible
Even if we don't know this saying, we probably adhere to it to a certain degree. We are the lord's of our own destiny and the conductor of our own dreams. When we want something we should just reach out and grab it. God must surely understand that and silently cheer us on as we boldly carve our own fate.
That is not true, or at least not healthy. We, as humans, were never meant to be our own sole supplier, nor were we ever expected to be our own destiny maker. Believe it or not, God has a lot to say about your life and a plan to back it up.
But wait, are you saying I am too stupid to do what is good for me? Wouldn't God respect me for taking such a courageous plunge?
Yes, God respects you for having a head full of ideas. In fact, some of those ideas may have been planted by him. But the point is that a life where you give yourself everything you think you need, without counsel or reverence, is just plain stupid. God does not help those who help themselves. He will let you take the wheel of your own life and steer it where you desire. If you crash and burn, by getting discouraged or waking up naked in a back alley in Cincinnati, He will gladly sit down with you and give you guidance. The worse alternative is you finding complacency in your own way and then being told in Heaven that you settled for silver when God had gold for you. Just looking at the horrible script writing for movies like Date Movie, Epic Movie, Meet the Spartans, Disaster Movie and other parody franchises, you can see the results of not going to God for guidance. Imagine the lives of Bible heroes without God interfering:

Abraham would have driven himself to be a devout pagan worshiper, but would have never been the father of all Israel.

Moses would strive to be a trouble maker for Egyptian social injustice, but he probably would have been killed before he could make any waves.

King David would be known as shepherd David and his biggest claim to fame would be fighting a bear with a stick.
In the divine scheme of things we are spiritual children meant for spiritual guidance. But on the other hand we are prone to wander, bound to leave the God we love. In those times we have Jesus, the redeemer, drawing us back to our original meaning.

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Build Your Own Social Network (2 Easy Steps)

Social networks live by two rules: 1) They need to have pictures and status bars and 2) They need to have quirky names. Inability to follow these instructions probably means you don't have a social network, or you may accidentally have a website that is useful to society.

I want to make sure you have the second rule of social networking mastered so that you can make millions of dollars off the lol market. I have created this social network name generator which will aid you in 50% of your social network creation. Just combine a word from column A to on from column B and add .com after it.

Column A


Column B


Tuesday, January 18, 2011

6 Awesome iPod/iPhone games

6. Puppet War

Puppet Wars has some of the best graphics I have seen in an iPod game. This surprisingly smooth FPS plays like Call of Duty's zombie mode. It has cute charm and fun weapons to back it up.It gets boring kind of quick, but at least it's worth it's dollar.

5. Chop Chop Ninja

Chop Chop Ninja used to be free, but not anymore! As the name would imply, you play as a ninja, jump kicking your way through baddies to save the geisha from an evil war lord who keeps transforming her into stuff. It's a tap em' up involving chaotic combos, wild power ups and some great level design. Chop Chop Ninja is cute and (when I played it) it was my favorite flavor: free.

4. Brothers in Arms: Global Conflict

Putting an FPS on the iPhone can feel like putting Microsoft Word on a Speak-And-Spell. But amidst the failed attempts, Ubisoft put together a pretty tight shooter in Brothers in Arms: Global Conflict. The shooting controls are customizable, the graphics are good looking and the action is pretty intense. Along with all that is a pretty deep, soul-searching story that the Brothers in Arms franchise is known for. There's even multiplayer for the few people who still believe that FPS's can be competent on the portable devices.

3. Skeeball

It's cheaper than a dollar store ball-in-a-cup toy and its more rewarding than you think. Skeeball has great ball physics, a multiplier score system and an unlockable reward center for collectibles. Go ahead, try not to be addicted.

2. Wolfenstein RPG
EA Studios

Wolfenstein RPG seems like an idea your friends might make up after a few drinks. A historically inaccurate shooter from WWII meets Final Fantasy. It's a peculiar concept and it takes time to get used to, but you will notice that Wolfenstein RPG is actually quite engaging, deep and legitimately funny. When you combine turn-based gameplay, an intuitive syringe power up system and some interesting weapons, you have quite the package.

1. Spider-Man: Total Mayhem

No one expects iPhone games to be story-driven, fully voiced, or to have deep fighting systems. Spider-Man: Total Mayhem is all of that. The gameplay feels like a portable edition of Dynamite Cop for the arcade, but Gameloft went above and beyond to make sure this was worth every penny. This game has combos, web moves, power ups, quick tap events, mini games, collectibles and a whole slew of other things bundled in with a professionally-voiced story. This Spider-man definitely does justice.


Monday, January 17, 2011

5 Most Awkward Moments at the Golden Globes (Humor)

"And another thing...we should deport all..."

5. Robert Deniro

Was it the rambling on and on for too long, or the fact that he suggested that the Foreign Film Press needed to be deported back to their country? Whatever it was, Robert Deniro gets some serious points for taking up lots of our time and insulting the benefactors.

Uneasy Laughter Rating: 2/5

The Sequel: Baby Bop's Version (Property of Leigh)

4. Barney's Version

Apparently this was a movie starring Paul Giamatti, but the problem is that no one knew what it was. I'm not talking about the audience, but even Wikipedia didn't have too much information on this movie. Did someone forget to market? This just goes to show that people don't have to see your movie in order for it to win. Other honorable mentions for this category: Winter's Bone, Frankie and Alice and Rabbit Hole.

Uneasy Laughter Rating: 1/5

At least they removed the defecating on the Dutch flag bit.

3. Ricky Gervais

America needs to learn that British hosts are not safe for children, or people not exposed to war. Ricky tried to shoot for charming, but ended up insulting the whole spectrum of people. Not since Russell Brand triumphantly mocked the Christians, called President Bush retarded and defiled all that was innocent at the MTV Music Awards, has a Brit host tried to make everyone equally as offended. Here's a simple tip for picking the next host for an awards show: if you have to plead with them not to make a Hitler reference and use the American flag as a napkin, they are probably not people-appropriate.

Uneasy Laughter Rating: 4/5

"I can has talk words"

2. Bad Public Speaking

The room is full of passionate experts in the art of drama and theater, but not a single one of them can do public speaking. What tipped this off? Diane Warren, writer for Burlesque, stared at her mic for the whole acceptance speech, Robert Deniro went off on side tangents, Justin Beiber looked like a deer in the headlights and many of the A-list actors couldn't make teleprompter reading look natural. The whole world looks to America to emote and deliver lines and our guys can't even get through a paragraph to introduce the next nominees.

Uneasy Laughter Rating: It just hurt!

Get this man some Anti-Viagra

1. Robert Downey Jr.

Nothing made us cringe more than having Robert Downey Jr. tell the female nominees that they may have had sex with him. In his infinite charm he went through the list and spoke about his feeble attempts to procreate with women. He then got to Emma Stone, the youngest of the bunch, and winked sending a wave of discomfort through the crowd. This just goes to show that a hostage situation isn't the only way to make a crowd feel in danger.

Uneasy Laughter Rating: C R I N G E!

Honorable Mention:

"My song is not literal, guys, it's a metaphor."

There was an NBC commercial about the show, America's Next Great Restaurant, in which the Kelis song "Milkshake" was the background piece. For those of you who do not know the song "Milkshake", it is a proud statement of how a young girl's mammary gland sizes and how she implements them can cause young men to want to visit her location. Apparently NBC thought it was a song about a literal suburban milkshake vendor that only caters to men. I can see the confusion.

Sunday, January 9, 2011

Newsboys- Born Again

Album: Born Again
Label: Inpop Records

The Newsboys are the turkey and gravy of Christian pop and it was sad to see Peter Furler go, but it was equally as sweet to see Michael Tait enter in.  Does he carry on the Newsboys legacy?

If only one thing could be said about true Christian pop, is that it's upbeat, energetic and a stadium anthem of candy tones.  Newsboys takes that stigma and ramps it up a notch.  Combine the sincerity of Tait's vocals, the borrowed synth of Owl City, and the instruments of a few Aussie rockers and you get something that has never come from a Newsboys album before.  Born Again is symbolic of their new addition and the Christian faith.  Fast forward a few synth songs to When the Boys Light Up and you find Toby Mac bringing his urban celebration jam in the mix.  No matter what band you put Tait in you have to make a DC Talk reference (tear :'( ).  This album has virtually no references to Newsboys' instrumental styles, save for some violin scores and keyboard riffs on the dramatic songs.  You'll have to say goodbye to the Aussie accent.

Lyrically, Born Again has a bigger head nod to Stepping up to the Microphone with songs like Build us Back and Escape.  The words are more poppy and rhythmic, giving the audience motivation to start jumping around.  The only bad move on this album was asking KJ-52 to sing the rap on Jesus Freak.  You can't mess with the classics even if you are KJ-52 (I miss DC Talk).

Newsboys are excited on this album and it bleeds through every anthem they sing.  They are electrified by God's involvement in their life and their break from Peter Furler.  The album is balanced and contains great amounts of energy.  If you aren't giving a standing ovation to God by the end of the album you need to go back to Sandi Patti. 

Born Again:
This is what it is
This is who I am
This is where I finally take my stand
I didn't want to fall, but I don't have to crawl
I met the one with two scarred hands
Givin' him the best of, everything that's left of
The life inside this man
I've been Born Again

More lyrics:
+ Michael Tait's Vocals
+ Yay God!

-- Nothing sounds all that familiar from the old cast
-- I miss DC Talk

Kevin's Top Video Game Picks of 2010

This summer was the beginning of my true gaming life. I've played video games a ton. I've also become fairly well versed while at friends' houses, however until recently, the newest console that I owned was a Super Nintendo!

This summer I saved my dollars and purchased an Xbox 360 Elite. Since my real gaming didn't begin until the middle of the year, my "games of 2010" spill over into 2009 (and even earlier, but I figured I had to draw the line somewhere...).

Halo Reach

This game was one of my most anticipated games of 2010, but I didn't jump on board right away. Instead I dragged my feet completing a few games I was already in the midst of. I ended up borrowing it from a friend about three weeks ago, after he had completed it.

I'm thrilled! I still haven't finished the campaign, because I refuse to play on any difficulty lower than legendary, but I've had a blast online! The graphics are smooth and clean, there are fewer exploits than in previous releases, and I enjoy most of the additions they've made. The gameplay was updated enough to keep it fresh, even though this is the sixth Halo release. The inclusion of the Daily and Weekly Challenges provide a great reason to keep coming back. Armor modification was also fun and interesting and the implementation of the credit system makes it all the more addicting.

Fallout: New Vegas

New Vegas is the first game I have ever pre-ordered and I couldn't be happier with my decision. Fallout 3 was one of my favorite games to play at friends' houses. After everyone else had fallen asleep, I would load up my save file and play as much as I could before the sun came up. With the release of New Vegas (and the purchase of my own console), it immediately became my new obsession. I took every sidequest i could, created multiple characters, and still enjoy playing it often!

The wide open feel of the game, both in geography and morality, is what really draws me to it. Your choices affect the world in realistically significant ways, every evil or morally-questionable decision you make stays in the back of your mind.

The game grabs you from the jump, with a cutscene in which you witness, from a first person perspective, your character being shot and buried. This was a great start to the game and it continued to impress for hours afterward (up to this very moment in fact).

New modifications to the gameplay, such as weapon customization, faction alliances, disguises and companions, all kept the experience separate from Fallout 3. The graphics, although somewhat glitchy and unstable, were much smoother looking than in previous releases, much to my pleasure.

Fable III

The original Fable (including The Lost Chapters) is my favorite game, bar none. I have probably beaten it more than 50 times and I still play once in a while. When Fable II came out, I was all over it. I bought a copy of it to bring to my friends' houses and everything. Unfortunately, I sold it within a week. I was unbelievably disappointed with it.

When Fable III was announced, I was excited, but skeptical. I still haven't actually purchased it, but I was able to test the gameplay at different points in the game, by jumping into my friends' save games and have been thoroughly impressed, not to mention relieved. THIS is the Fable I remember!

There are still some things that I think the original did better, but overall it kicked Fable II out the door! The fighting style was a tolerable mix between the first and second Fable games. The modification of appearance was also much improved from the second Fable, and the "jobs" of Fable II were also well incorporated. I am marking Fable III as my new item to save money for and will be playing my own copy on my own console as soon as I possibly can.

Thursday, January 6, 2011

10 Horrible Dating Sites

1. Ignore the Junk out of
Premise: We give you tons of beautiful girls that are single in your area and have the same interests as you. Once we get them connected to you, they friend you on Facebook and never talk to you again. It's like they never existed.

Score: I have hopes for this one.


Premise: This is a niche site for everyone who liked the current Tron movie who also wants to date others who liked that movie. The website asks you a Tron specific question in order to determine if you are legit.

Score: There were only six people on the site and 3 of them were from Ireland.

Premise: Another niche site that welcomes middle aged, balding men to search for local asian women, nineteen year olds and women who work at Rite Aid. The methods of communication involve contacting your partner over

Score: Every profile picture is taken through window blinds. Not very promising.


Premise: singles who have a strong dislike toward diabetes pairing together. You don't need to have diabetes, you just need to hate it. Spend endless hours describing your loathe for the needles and the insulin medicine. Don't worry, we screen our profiles. In fact, some people with the actual ailment have been turned away due to their indecision about it.

Score: Very good! People who hate diabetes are actually very hot.


Premise: Ever have a foreigner ask you for marriage within three seconds of bumping into them on a crowded street. Well now you can find them everywhere in one spot. Quick Foreigner Marriage takes desperate white women and matches them to foreign men who have polar opposite cultural values. In no time you will be cleaning Vloraf's wooden stove while he throws chicken at you. If we cannot get you married in three days of your match, we will execute a profile member.

Score: It's disheartening that the only English half the foreigners know is, "Marriage now or my people will kill me."

Premise: Apparently you can be a famous director and have a unique handsome look. This website is devoted to matching girls with men who act like M. Night Shymalan. These men will spend countless hours looking sharp, while demanding encouragement for horrible projects that should have never been given to children. On special occasions they will brag about ambitions that require Bruce Willis to be dead or plan out simple campaigns that involve water to solve the solution.

Score: I don't know, I mean he's cute, but he needs to get a hobby!


Premise: Before dating sites were big, you usually had to get drunk at a New Year's Eve party to wake up with a woman who talks to cats. Now we stockpile them online. If you are the kind of guy who can't live without a relationship where she weeps horribly when you ask her "chicken or fish?" then we have those. Maybe you want a girl who makes a scene in public because your elbow touched another girl--you are in luck! We match you with any unstable issue including: paranoia, violent mood swings, irratic lust, ultra sensitive, control isues and unhealthy animal attention.

Score: This website has both quantity and quality in this area.


Premise: Usually Christian websites are dirty, filthy and no different then trying to get a date at a bar. We took all of Christian culture and put it into one handy dating site so you don't sin. All profiles contain modest head shots of women in bonnets, with other photos of them churning butter or writing letters to Mr. Darcy. The male profiles all contain promises that the men are truly dating out of the Lord's will and they swear to be pure throughout the courtship because sex is never an issue that would cross their mind. If you choose to hook up with someone you will be put on a 3 month waiting period of answering questions from her father before you are allowed to enter the "side hug" phase. After the side hug phase your wildest dreams will come true--hand holding.

Score: I really like the Charismatic package you can get where you are allowed to follow a girl around saying "God told me we are getting married" until she submits or gets a restraining order.


Premise: Do you remember being in high school and wanting someone hot looking and superficial? Are you jealous of the Jersey Shore relationships and their lack of substance? How about living like a rock star and dating like one to? You can go back to those dreamy times, where the outside mattered way more than the inside and love was just a game. We hook you up with thousands of hotties, with no intention to love, befriend, encourage or know you. It's all good times with no fear of maturity.

Score: Yes the women are good looking, but all their pastimes include blacking out in a bar, while looking through a plastic surgeon's catalog.


Premise: We give you tons of beautiful girls that are single in your area and have the same interests as you. Once we get them connected to you, they friend you on Facebook and never talk to you again. It's like they were never there.

Score:Wait...what? Oh...I get it.

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Epic Mickey (Wii)

Epic Mickey
Company: Disney Studios
Players: 1

Disney = magic.  Everyone knows that.  It only makes sense that Nintendo capitalize on that magic.  Disney piles on the memories, fantasy and good ol' fashion platforming to make a game that falls more in the Epic Fail category.

Mickey Mouse, that crazy minx, has done it again.  He went into a magical mirror, played with a wizard's paint kit and created a dark world of destruction.  He gets sucked into that world with a magic paintbrush and given the task of saving Disney World.

The story is Epic Mickey's strongest format, showing water colored cutscenes and dialogue progressions.  The story has the same gripping fan service as Kingdom Hearts with an old timey soundtrack and a high dose of sentimentality.

The play control, on the other hand, leads something to be desired.  Epic Mickey has two main paint controls: painting and thinning. You paint objects to make them visualize and you thin objects to make them disappear.  This leads to tons of creative puzzles. You can also fight enemies with the paintbrush using the thinner or the paint.  Using thinner kills your baddies and using your paint makes them into your friends. The two different paints lets you make good choices of building or evil choices of destruction (kind of like GTA for kids). Outside of the story you can collect film reels, story art and earn achievements that look like Playstation trophies. While the idea of paint game play is revolutionary this game seems to have borrowed a camera control system from old N64 games.  It can barely stay with you when navigating Disney World.  This leads to a lot of unfair deaths.  As you further through the missions, you will find that half of your missions are fetch quests.  It gets tireless having to get "something" for someone.

Graphics are the best I have seen on the Wii.  They are very colorful and rich, with great paint illustrations.  The music of old Mickey cartoons brings out the magic feelings of walking through Disney World.  Presentation is truly a strong point of this game, but controls and camera will dampen that experience

Ultimately, Epic Mickey is the Wii's push for games with substance and style and it fulfills its promise.  I just wish there was more polish added to that substance.

What does it mean?

The main theme of Epic Mickey is a Wizard painting the world for glory and Mickey throwing it into darkness.  Sounds like the Adam and Eve story.  God is the artist of creation and Adam and Eve were the creation that ruined it.  Mickey is called to enter the messed up creation, save the world and restore it.  Jesus, in the same way, enters into our messed up canvas to repaint it.  It's a simple illustration of creation, damnation and redemption, but it shows that in all things we need a hero who can save.

The Breakdown
+ Great graphics
+ Wonderful presentation

-- Fetch quests
-- Bad camera
-- Lots of death


Monday, January 3, 2011

Heroes You Didn't Know Died

Death and life in the super hero world is a swinging door.  It's no surprise that characters like Green Lantern, Green Arrow, Super Boy, Superman and Captain America died.  But did you know about these few characters?  Please click on the pictures to get the full story art.

Supergirl (1959--1988)

Bucky Barnes 

Batman Earth-2

Blue Beetle

Spider-Woman (Mattie Franklin)

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