Wednesday, July 6, 2011

A Tribute to 90's Game Shows

Yea for obesity!

What I have always wanted to do on certain game shows:

* Kick one of the token stealing guards in the junk for jumping out at me in Legends of the Hidden Temple

*  Eat the giant kiddie pool of Ice Cream Sundae, instead of trudging through it in Double Dare.

* Get the highest score ever in the history of video games on Nick Arcade

* Get past the final round of Singled Out and then admit that I am gay.

* Try to sell Visine eye solution to Ben Stein, while trying to win his money in Win Ben Stein's Money

* Start throwing pieces of the Agro Crag at Mike O' Malley in Guts

Ask out the referee Moe in Guts

* Keep gunning for a physical challenge on every Double Dare question no matter how easy it was

* Create a secret handshake with Omar Gooding in Wild and Crazy Kids

* Fake an epilepsy seizure when Nick Arcade puts me in the video game

* Knock over pieces of the plastic set on Legends of the Hidden Temple to get to the next room



Prizes:

Huffy Mountain Bike
L.A. Lights Shoes
Casio Keyboard

The Desire Chart of 90's Game Shows

100% Nick Arcade- I get prizes for playing video games.  Strangely, none of those prizes are video games
90% Double Dare- The only studio you could ensure that an elderly person would not be at.
75% Legends of the Hidden Temple-  I have to kayak in a raging pool all because Pocahontas was a legend
50% Win Ben Steins Money- I could get at least 50 bucks in right answers
35% Guts- I get to prove to Australian Moe how out of shape I am
20% Figure It Out- Why won't the kid from Pete and Pete understand my cool hobby


Australia did not exist in my world until I met you Moe.

Host Hierarchy:

GUTS Mike O' Malley: That guy from Yes Dear
DOUBLE DARE Mark Summers: Do not get him dirty
WILD AND CRAZY KIDS Omar Gooding:  Not to be confused with the Reading Rainbow guy
SINGLED OUT Chris Hardwick:  Was it hard being overshadowed by Jenny McCarthy and than Carmen Electra?

Don't you dare come near me with that grass stain!
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